May 8, 2007

I have a very large [extended] family. I wouldn’t say huge, but once the next generation start’s having kid we should qualify. It got a lot bigger since Aunt Tonya started having kids again (she already had two). Three more, to be exact. And none of them are older than 4. It’s pretty crazy over there. Here’s something of a what the day is like for my poor Aunty.

6:43: You wake of to the sound of crying. You can’t tell if it’s actually crying or if your ears are still ringing from last night. Fromthe pitch and decibal you discern that it’s the four year old, who you guess is down stairs in the kitchen. You roll out of bed, trying not to crush the multitude of pacifiers on the ground. You peek into the 2 and 4 year olds’ bedroom, and there, sitting in the corner, is the 2 year old. Searching through your longterm memory, you finally remember that this one’s name is Lena. Right? Or was that the first one? No, wait… Anyway, as you observe her actions more closely, you realize that she’s methodically pulling the hair out of her sister’s doll. No time to interfere. You head down the stairs to see what all the crying is all about. As you walk down the stairs, you mentally review today’s work. Dentist for the older two, you remember vaugely that you promised the young ones you would take them to the park. Well, if you remember right, there was some grass behind the dentist’s office. They wouldn’t know the difference.Finally you get to the crying. It is Dani, as you suspected. She’s in the kitchen, also as you suspected (you’ve had a lot of practice). She’s holding the jug of milk, attempting to poor it into her sipper, and pitching a fit because none of the milk is issueing forth (the cap is on). Well, after you help her, and send her up to bed to get some more sleep, you look in the fridge to see about breakfast. It’s contents pour out in a gushing torrent. Dani must have tried to put all the other food she got out back. That was something new. Normally it would be spread between the basement and her bedroom (a difference of two floors). Still, you have about as much work to do as if she’d not put it all back. At that moment, you hear a screaming, followed by crying (that’d be Lena). Suddenly you remember what Lena was doing with those dolls… Dani’s pretty vengeful.

Well, that was about the first ten minutes of her day. You can imagine the rest.


2 Responses to “Family”

  1. Tonya Says:

    Oh my Jacob, you know our family so well!! I love this story, you are so witty and clever. I almost peed laughing, but instead I cried!! LOL
    I love you.

  2. Zach Says:

    u r telling me

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